JESUS Rocks!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Saul's speech to his officials - it's all about ME! When I read Saul's speech to his officials in 1 Sam 22:7-8, the word 'ME' stood out to me =) from this passage. "Is that why you have all conspired against ME? No one tells ME when MY son makes a covenant with the son of Jesse. None of you is concerned about ME or tells ME that MY son has incited MY servant to lie in wait for ME, so he does today." In one verse, Saul mentioned 'ME' 5 times, indirectly 3 times, making reference to himself 8 times! Saul has become concerned only about himself. Someone who looks at himself and thinks he is the only one important in the world. Someone who looks only to his needs, his desires and his commands no matter what it takes. Someone who has only himself before his eyes and consider everything his yet forgot everything is God's. But often when we are in a difficult time or when we are in fear as Saul feared for his kingdom being taken away and him removed as king, don't we become that 'someone' too? God, why is this happening to me? God, why is everyone against me? God why does no one understand me? God, why do I have to go through this? Why why why me??? =)

Four days ago, my eyesight start to become strange. My right eye started to see a black thing - looking a bit like a spider hanging from the celling - of about 1 cm long and it doesn't go away. It really irritates me as I try to work on my assignments and was unable to focus. I'm yet to find out as to what is happening to my eye, thinkint it'd just go away but on Sunday (the third day since it started), I stood before God with fear of not knowing what's wrong with my eye, I offered it to God. Instead of saying why is this happening to me, I said to God, let your will be done. I was in fear and not that I'm holy that I offered it to God but simply because I acknowledge there is nothing I can do but to pray and entrust it to God. I thought about going back to Australia straight away for medical checks but I chose not to until I know how serious the condition is. I'm still young, under 30 =p haha and if I have to stay this way for the rest of my life, I can only say God use what I have and do what you will through me for everything would be for your glory and to accomplish your purposes. Do pray for me for healing, I have not given up in believing God to take away this strange black thing blocking my vision & at the same time, trusting Him for whatever is to come!

penned at 11:41 PM